His own man
by just a space duck
Summary: Vegetto's didn't defuse; he want's to live his life without the chains of his past lives holding him down.
1. Chapter 1

"I'M NOT VEGETA DAMN IT!" the booming voice broke through the air with firmness. A purple haired woman sat crying with tears rolling down her cheeks, a young lavender haired boy consoling her with a hand on the shoulder while he himself gazed at the floor.

"B-b-but" Bulma stuttered between sobs as her puffy eyes looked at the saiya-jin in front of her.

"The Supreme Kai told you this would happen! You knew I was going to be my own person." spoke the frustrated man in a more mediated tone. He didn't like yelling at the woman who had meant so much to his former selves, but nothing else had gotten through to her.

"What about last Friday then? Did it mean nothing to you?" accused the purple haired beauty.

Vegetto sighed; he was getting tired of repeating himself. "My mind was still getting meshed together, I was basically two people in one body and things got a little bit crazy. I've already told you this"

"So that's it then? It's all over? All those years of my life I gave to an ungrateful jerk and I'm going to die alone?" She shrieked while dabbing her tear stricken face with a napkin.

"Now don't say that Bulma" Vegetto assured. "You've got Trunks, plus I'm sure Yamcha would be inter…"

"LEAVE!" she blasted out at him.

Vegetto tried to hide his triumphant smirk as he was finally dismissed. Bulma might have been more attractive of his old wives but she had definitely been the most trouble to settle things with. Chichi hadn't been too affected; her husband being dead for seven years had conditioned her pretty well and it was almost like the breakup had been official before they even spoke. Bulma on the other hand had a temper to her, and the circumstances around Vegeta's final demise and their still passionate relationship had left her distraught.

Vegetto understood this, he that in a way she was subconsciously expecting him to fix what his birth had ruined, but the son couldn't be faulted for the sins of the father, as weird as thinking of Vegeta as his father felt.

_Speaking of father. _He thought. He gestured for Trunks to follow him out the sitting room of the main Capsule Corp building. Trunks hesitated for a second, considering whether he should stay to console his crying mother, but decided to follow his father outside.

They walked out to the front yard, the gravity chamber standing unused just a few feet away from them. Trunks' eyes fell on the torture chamber that now held so many cherished memories.

"Listen son" Vegetto gripped Trunks' shoulder and gave it a squeeze. "I'll be away for a while; I need you to take care of your mother for me, ok?" Trunks sniffled.

"You'll come back, right dad?" he asked with hope in his voice.

Vegetto grinned at him "Of course. No matter where in the universe I am, I can be back here in an instant" He tapped his temple with his thumb and middle finger. "Now I'm sure you'll want to spend your time playing with your brothers eh?" Trunks' eyes lit up at the thought. Gohan and Goten were now his brothers! As an older brother he now had the RIGHT to boss Goten around!

An evil smirk filled the young demi-saiyan's face as he blasted off in the direction of the 439 mountain area.

Vegetto shook his head as his middle child flew off into the distance. Taking one look back at the eerily silent Capsule Corp building, he blasted off into space.

Once he'd killed Buu the Supreme Kai and Dende had gone with him to Namek. The first two whishes had been used to bring back the people of earth and restore all that had been destroyed. There had been no use for the third one, so Vegetto whished himself and all his friends the ability to breathe in space, eliminating his final barrier to total freedom.

It took him three seconds to pass the sun, in less than twenty seconds he'd cleared the whole galaxy.

A month later found Vegetto in one of the south galaxies, either #2202 or #2753. The planet he was currently in used to be one of Frieza's many planets, one of the few he'd been able to establish outside of his home galaxy before his untimely demise. Decades after the ice-jinn empire crumbled, this planet was now a galactic rest stop where many travelers dropped off to refuel their ships and have a drink at one of the many bars. The planet was a barren desert outside of the dirty and grimy city were all the establishments lay, a perfect place for the kind of character who would stop at an intergalactic rest stop.

Vegetto had never been here, though Vegeta's memories brought forth images of dozens of planets just like this one where he Nappa and Raditz would go after a mission.

He looked out the apartment's only window where weak rays of sunlight tried and failed to reach the bed. The room had been rented out by some unlucky alien who was neither powerful nor respected enough to keep it.

His partner groaned and turned over in the bed, resting her head on his chest, her hand scratching Vegetto's tail wrapped around her waist. Her auburn curls blocked his view of her face so he pushed a few of the thick strands away. This planet was full of whores but this woman was different, she was a pirate, Vegetto had been drawn to the coldness in her blue eyes that contrasted so much with the women his previous selves had loved.

The female in his arms stirred and stretched, taking great pleasure in popping the bones on her fingers and neck.

She opened her eyes and looked into his pitch black orbs. "You haven't left, that's very unusual in a man"

"I was thinking of leaving, but there's something special about you" that was a lie. He hadn't left simply because he'd just woken up.

She stroked lazy patterns across his sculptured chest and looked at him over her long lashes "Don't tell me I have another stalker, it would be a shame to kill you"

This brought a smirk to Vegetto's face "You couldn't kill me if you tried"

She rolled her eyes and moved away from him, getting ready to pick up her discarded clothing.

"What's your name" Vegetto asked. She looked at him over her shoulder with a raised eyebrow while putting on her underwear.

"You're serious? Listen, it'd be advantageous for your health to not get involved with me"

"Boyfriend?" Vegetto asked.

She frowned in disgust at the thoughts that comment brought on. "Boss, very powerful" she said offhandedly. The fact that he didn't know who her boss was surprised her; he'd seemed like a very in-the-know individual, not this naïve character.

Vegetto smelled an opportunity. It might be fun to mess around with pirates for a few days; it wasn't like he had anything better to do. His partner saw that he had become silent and thought that he'd given the argument a rest so she continued looking for her garments. He silently watched the short beauty dress and concentrated on committing her ki signature to memory. He doubted that her crew would leave the planet today, but it's better to be safe than sorry.

The blue skinned alien headed for the door and paused only once to look over her shoulder. She seemed to be searching for something to say to him, and finally settled on a monotone "Take care".

Vegetto gave her a nod and she exited through the door. He waited a few seconds after the door closed before resting his head on the pillow and closing his eyes. Hopefully her "boss" could put up a good fight; he'd been desperate for one of those since his birth.

A few hours later he was walking around the busy marketplace at the heart of the planet's only city. His tail swished happily behind him; the passage of time and being relatively far from the principal east galaxy made saiya-jin unrecognizable in this part of the universe, so Vegetto could walk around freely without worrying about getting identified as a saiya-jin.

"Vegetto! My friend!" called the voice of a nearby vendor. An alien the size of Piccolo sized alien resembling a cockroach waved one of his many limbs at Vegetto. Vegetto waved back and tried to hide the bile from rising up his throat. He had inherited Vegeta's hate for all squirmy and squishy things, and as likeable as Racha was Vegetto got Goosebumps just from looking at him.

Vegetto had saved his entire planet from an army of space spiders; in return they'd offered Vegetto a banquet and a harem of thirty hand-picked maidens… he'd declined. Still Racha had given him the coordinates for this particular rest station where he worked and as a token of appreciation he'd give Vegetto enough of his profits so that the saiya-jinn could pay for his food while on the planet.

"Hey Vegetto, how you liking Station 9 eh?" He asked with his pitch-black bug eyes. Vegetto suppressed a shudder at the way the insectoid's creepy underside wriggled.

"It's ok. I think I'm leaving tonight though" he said offhandedly while inspecting the objects Racha had for sale, mostly laser rifles and other kinds of weapons.

"Goin' back to your home planet?" asked the anthropomorphic cockroach.

"Yeah I am, gotta go back to the wife and kids" Vegetto lied; he still wasn't ready to deal with his family on earth again.

"Well then I have a gift for you my friend" one of Racha's arms searched for something in one of the shelves "Very important to thank you for everything you did. If not for you my whole race would be wrapped up in space-silk. Ah, here we go" He pulled an egg similar in size to those of dinosaurs out to full view.

"This here is one of my peoples eggs, has about two to three hundred hatchlings in it. You take it to your planet and let it hatch, you'll always have some of my people to remind you of your friends, what you think?" asked the insect.

Vegetto didn't even try to hide the horrified look on his face. "T-t-that's very nice of you Racha" He took the egg from him without argument, not wanting to stay here any longer than necessary. He'd dump it in a star first chance he got.

"I actually wanted to ask you something" Vegetto said while gingerly holding the giant egg so as to not get cockroach guts spilled over himself. "Do you know of any famous space pirates running around here?"

Racha's entire demeanor changed. The jubilant space-roach became nervous, giving a look around his booth with his gigantic eyes before speaking in a whisper.

"Y-you, you don't know?" he asked incredously.

"What?" Vegetto responded, now curious.

"He's known throughout the universe; the most feared space pirate in seven galaxies, he's been going at it for centuries some say." He looked at Vegetto in disbelief "You mean you've never heard of Bojack?"

Vegetto racked his brain for any mention of the name. "ummm…nope"

"You should hope to never cross his path. Some say he's even stronger than Frieza was!" Racha shuddered at the thought.

Vegetto shrugged. "Well, I'll be seeing you Racha" he walked away before the cockroach thought of giving him a goodbye hug or anything like that. Tonight he'd search for the girl and hopefully pick a fight with her boss; right now he had to take a quick trip to the nearest star.

The main bar in Station planet 9 was actually pretty nice by human standards. Everything was clean and it was very spacious, with many private booths littering the establishment. It looked almost like a nightclub except for the lack of music and lights.

On one booth on the far east wall was a group of blue skinned aliens sat. The one in the middle of the booth was the tallest with long orange hair tied up in a bandana. To his right and left were slightly shorter henchmen with similar hair color; one had a beard and a Mohawk and the other had spiky hair and a sword strapped to his back. The final two occupants of the booth sat at each end; a short male with a turban and a short female with long curly red hair.

"You know Zangya, we could have been here earlier if you hadn't spent so much time fixing up your hair" Bujin commented.

Zangya glared at her crewmate and folded her arms over her chest. "Fuck off you little towel-head"

Bido chuckled from across the table. "It's not her fault Bujin. She's just gotten to that age where she's desperate for a litter and starts flauting herself at any man that comes by"

"Funny how you four seem to be the exception" she retorted. Bido growled at her and clenched his fists. Zangya was one of the more attractive females from their home planet; from the very start of their pirating she had made clear her disinterest in any of them. Bojack and the others went along with it as there were more than enough females to rape in space and they didn't want the hassle of interviewing for a new member.

"That's enough" said Bojack, slightly annoyed. "I called this meeting to discuss a little problem."

Bojack reached into his black leather jacket and produced out an empty crystal case about the size of a human head. He set it down on the table and waited for his crew members to observe it.

"What's wrong with that picture?" he asked after a tick.

The pirates looked at each other for a few seconds wondering what answer their boss wanted. Finally kogu bit the bullet.

"No cosmic egg" he ascertained.

"Exactly" Bojack responded.

The cosmic egg had been an artifact developed by the Arachnos race which they had prepared to use in war. It was some sort of warping device that could transform elements into anything the user desired, though you needed an understanding of the Arachnos' technology for it to work.

It was to be used in their war against the Blattarians. The Arachnos were mysteriously wiped out before they could utilize their weapon.

Bojack had come into some information about the whereabouts of the egg: the Blattarians had found it. He had immediately seeked out the Blattarian working in Station Planet 9's market and leveraged through him an exchange of the egg for his people's continued survival.

Bojack had already planned to auction the egg off, receive the money and then kill the buyer for huge profit.

"So aren't you going to tell us what happened already?" asked an impatient Zangya.

Bojack sent her a glare and decided he'd need to remind her of her station later. "The idiotic roach messed up and gave the egg to some idiot who doesn't even know he has it"

Bido and Bujin tried hard to suppress a grin at the absurdity of such a situation. Kogu raised his eyebrows.

"Did you get the identity of this person out of him?" he asked.

Bojack nodded to his most dignified henchman. "He had a low threshold for pain. The man we're looking for is named Vegetto, I read his mind and got a clear picture of the guy" Bojack's eyes swept around the bar as if he expected Vegetto to show up at any moment. "Look out for any idiot with spiky black hair and two bangs forming a V"

Zangya tensed at the description. It was very doubtful that there were many beings that fit that description on this planet.

"Also, he's got a monkey tail, swings it behind him like a jackass" Bojack added, his cold blue eyes returning to their scan of the establishment."

Zangya gulped silently and hoped that none of her partners had noticed her reaction. She really shouldn't care about the monkey's fate, he'd just been a one night stand, but she'd seen something in him that interested her like no man ever before.

Vegetto walked up to the bar. After getting rid of the disgusting egg he'd trained for a few hours. He had yet to find a limit to his power; even in base form he had enough firepower to destroy the universe many times over. It seemed that his Vegeta and Goku sides merging didn't just eliminate his double voice; it augmented his power even more.

Opening the door he could sense her presence nearby. Disappointment filled him as he gauged the highest power level in the place; it was barely on par with Perfect Cell. He'd thought that he could get a good fight out of this guy if he split himself with the multi-from technique but not even that would be enough.

"Oh well, might as well kill him anyway" Vegetto sighed. A strong fighter was still a strong fighter.

He entered and kept his eyes looking straight ahead, though he could already feel the burning gaze of many sets of eyes in the far east table.

"Look at that, ask and you shall receive" Bido said. The men of the table chuckled darkly. Many of the patrons at the bar could already see a confrontation coming and moved to leave, not wanting to get disintegrated in the fray.

"Doesn't look like he has it with him" Bujin commented. Vegetto hadn't changed from his customary blue and orange gi.

"Then he'll have to lead us to it" Bojack said. He nodded to Bido and Kogu and both stood up, Bido cracked his knuckles ready for a good beating.

Zangya sighed as she prepared for her part in this. _Oh, well _she thought, _I hope there's a good lay in Station Planet 6_.

The burly henchmen walked up to Vegetto, who had sat down in a stool at the bar and waited for them to come to him. The place had emptied out already with only a few brave bystanders peeking from outside the door. The bartender had retired to a secret bunker hidden in the shelves and was watching through a peephole.

Kogu stood back a few feet behind Vegetto and Bido sat down on the stool next to his. He drummed his fingers on the bar and took a few sideways glances at Vegetto.

_Not even worth my time. _Vegeto sighed but decided to play along for now.

"Hello there, friend" Bido began.

Vegetto turned to look him in the eye "What can I do for you?" he asked.

"heh. I'm about to find out" He clenched his fists and punched Vegetto in the face at the same time that Kogu put the saiya-jin in a stranglehold.

Something weird happened. Instead of the bleeding monkey Bido had expected the knuckles on his right hand broke spectacularly. He gasped in pain and leaped off the barstool, nursing his right hand in his left.

Kogu's choking wasn't going any better. Vegetto's face remained impassive as the alien's burly arms tried in vain to crush his wind pipe.

Kogu gritted his teeth and tried applying more pressure before the breath was snatched away from him. Chocking in pain he looked down to see a brown furry tail impaling his abdomen.

Kogu let go of Vegetto and Vegetto stood up, pulling his tail out of the pirate's stomach and slapping him across the face with it, twisting his neck. Kogu fell to the floor chocking on his own blood and Bido rushed him, throwing a ball of ki at the saiya-jin. Vegeto's tail swatted it directly at Bujin, who had attempted to sneak up on him. The short alien was knocked back by his partner's blast.

Bido flew directly at Vegetto, trying to hold down the fear that threatened to come to the surface. He saw Vegetto's tail swipe coming and dodged it at the last possible second, the soft fur only grazing his shoulder. He grinned triumphantly at this small victory before he felt himself going off center, his body having been sliced in half diagonally.

Something grabbed a hold of Vegetto's tail and he turned to see a sweating Bujin, thinking he'd gotten the drop on him. Vegetto tensed up and the hairs of his tail stood on end, stabbing through Bujjin's hand like splintered wood.

The short gypsy shrieked out in pain, releasing his grip on Vegetto's tail. Vegetto smashed his tail over Bujin's head like a mace, caving it in.

There was silence for a second, the soon-to-be-corpse of Kogu still gurgling in agony on the floor.

Bojack looked over at the still sitting Zangya "And you didn't attack him why…?"

Her face paled and she looked her boss in the eye, shaking in slight fear. "I'm not fond of dying"

Bojack frowned at her. "Too bad"

He brought his hand up to blast her away.

His hand exploded outwards in a shower of gore and bones.

Bojack snapped his head towards Vegetto. NOBODY was that strong. His henchmen were small fries and seeing them get killed wasn't too much of a surprise, but for someone to blow his hand up?

"So this is your boss huh?" Vegetto asked Zangya, who could only stare at him in shock and awe.

"You bitch!" Bojack growled out at Zangya. "You fucking traitor whore. You set us up?" he shot off a powerful blast at Zangya, which Vegetto lazily intercepted and reflected.

"You stupid whore! I'll kill you and your little monkey" Bojacks anger exploded outward as he transformed into his super state, incinerating the bar due to lack of control.

Vegeto felt the increase in raw power, though it was still just on par with Cell. He picked Zangya up bridal style and leapt away from the blast radius.

Zangya blinked, one moment she watched as her boss transformed into his ultimate state, surely killing her in the process, the next she was being dropped off on the ground a few miles away from the bar. She looked up at Vegeto, who had a disappointed look on his face as the only city in Station Planet 9 was destroyed in Bojack's rage.

"What the hell are you!" Zangya yelled at Vegetto, who was keeping his eyes on the explosion.

"Is that as strong as he gets?" he asked Zangya.

"What?" she retorted confusedly.

"Is that his strongest form?" Vegetto reiterated.

Zangya narrowed her eyes at Vegetto, just what kind of lunatic was this guy? "It is" she replied.

Vegetto looked like his dog had died. "I'd hoped…ahhh. It's not even worth it" the saiya-jin's shoulders slumped and he defeatedly raised two fingers, a move Nappa had originated.

Zangya felt it as the earth around her was subjected to enough force to level a galaxy, while she herself was protected by a force field. She could feel as the very fabric of the universe was stretched to its limit around her. The blinding white light of the technique soon became the only visible thing in the landscape.

When the light cleared there was no smoke, the ground was surprisingly intact despite there being not a single living thing outside of her and Vegetto.

"That's good progress" Vegetto said in a jovial voice reminiscent of Goku. "I should be able to master my ki to the point that even my most powerful blast won't break a boulder unless I want it to"

"This was all a training exercise to you?" Zangya coulnd't believes it. Her boss, the most powerful being in the universe had been taken out like a child.

"Well, I wanted a good fight, but he just couldn't provide it." Vegetto stretched and yawned.

"I never caught your name" he said offhandedly, already thinking about the nearest station planet to spend the night.

Zangya looked at him in the eyes for a long time, weighing the pros and cons of getting involved with this maniac. In the end, one side outweighed the other.

"Zangya"

"Two months and he still isn't back" Bulma lamented, she was having tea out in her garden along with Chichi.

"I thought you got over it Bulma" Chichi said between sips of tea.

"I have!" Bulma retorted a bit too loudly. She composed herself and continued "It's just that, Trunks really needs his father. Don't you feel the same about Gohan and Goten? "

Chichi shook her head. "Goten knew his father for a couple of days, Gohan has been without him for seven years, they can cope. You must have known this would happen Bulma, with Goku's tendency to run away and Vegeta's tendency to be a jackass all rolled into one." Chichi looked at her friend over her tea, a serene smile on her face. "He'll be back sooner rather than later, he won't want to abandon his sons; he just needs some time to sort himself out" Bulma nodded but remained silent. Chichi decided a change of subject was in order.

"So are you and Yamcha going to go out?" Chichi asked in a gossipy tone.

Bulma made a face at that suggestion. "I'm trying to move forward in my life Chi, not backwards" Bulma's face lit up into a smile. "There's this new intern…"

"…and there's a mystical ruby somewhere in this quadrant" Zangya quipped as she hovered over a map of the galaxy, trying to locate the planet that housed said ruby. A pair of strong arms wrapped around her waist and abruptly pulled her back onto the large bed. Zangya yelped and let go of the map, which fell on the floor.

Zangya growled as the jerk behind her nuzzled into her shoulder.

"You'll never be a good pirate if you can't keep your mind on the job you buffoon" Zangya said in mild annoyance, though in reality she enjoyed when Vegetto got frisky.

Vegetto kissed her shoulder. "The ruby's in a planet called Radia about three light years distance from here." He levitated the map and put his finger over a spot near the center of it.

Zangya grumbled, Vegetto wasn't anything if not a smart ass. They were in one of the West galaxies, on a spaceship they'd stolen from some unfortunate fool weeks ago.

Vegetto had found an outlet in plundering. While he found no one to challenge him in martial arts, stealing things gave him a thrill and a mental exercise. Whatever he and Zangya stole, he made sure to attempt to do it without being detected and without using any powers, so as to make it challenging. That isn't to say that he wasn't still obsessed with training, it was just that he was also interested in new ways of sneaking into high security facilities. He got a thrill out of it, though in the back of his mind he knew he wasn't in any danger and he could just as easily take whatever he wanted.

This was all new for Zangya too. Pirates weren't know for their subtlety, she was used to just going to a planet, killing everyone off and taking what she wanted. Now it was almost more about the act of stealing than the prize itself. She'd had to relearn the use of subtlety, though she was much more adept at it than the saiya-jin.

She was brought out of her musings by Vegetto's ministrations, which were very distracting. Zangya had begrudgingly grown to have a deep affection for him, though she'd initially planned to ditch him the first chance she got.

There was still his past to take care of though. She wouldn't have believed the story of his creation if… well she still didn't believe it; but if true dealing with his children and ex-wives would be a bit troublesome. Not that she cared, she had the most powerful man in the universe within her grasps and she wouldn't let him go.

_Vegetto, Can you hear me!_

Her head shot up in surprise as she heard the disembodied voice. She didn't look around, knowing it was telepathy, but glanced over at Vegetto. She was relieved to see him smiling and looking slightly up. If he'd had a serious expression it would have meant bad news.

_Whats up king kai! _She heard Vegetto's voice reply.

_We need your help Vegetto. Buu's spirit has been causing a lot of trouble down in hell and you're the only one we can turn to._

Vegetto shook with excitement. Even though Buu was considerably weaker now that he didn't have anyone absorbed but it was still a challenge. He grinned over to the confused looking Zangya and put his hand on her shoulder. Before she could give him a questioning look he'd teleported them over to other world.

Zangya blinked in confusion on finding herself in front of a fountain of blood, but that expression transformed into one of anger.

"Hey asshole! The next time you're going to teleport us away you better warn me first!" she emphasized it with a punch to his chest. She was going to follow it up with a few choice words, but then she felt it.

It was a huge, huge ki signature. The biggest one she had ever felt and the only one here.

"What is this place?" she asked as she got a good look at the landscape. Besides the blood fountain there were green fields, trees, gigantic spikes and other assorted elements. She'd never been on a planet like this one.

"It's hell. We're in the afterlife" Vegetto responded, a thoughtful look on his face as he deciphered what the single power level meant.

"So I'll be seeing my family and friends?" Zangya asked with sarcasm. She didn't really want to bump into Bojack or her family at the moment.

"I don't think so. There's only one being left here" well, not exactly, everyone was technically still there.

"Yes I can te-" Zangya was cut off when the blood fountain burst. A geyser of burgundy colored liquid towered over them, spraying them with blood.

The burgundy morphed into pink, the blood became denser and more gooey until it stopped flowing completely and froze in place for a second. Finally all the goop receded, vagely forming a humanoid shape.

"Buu!" she heard Vegetto yell out before a golden light engulfed him.

Vegetto couldn't believe his luck.

Buu had absorved every other being in hell, causing his power to grow exponentially.

The being that emerged from the fountain looked nothing like previous incarnations of Buu. He was twitching and grimacing with his teeth bared, a vein pulsing violently on his dome-shaped skull and a very thick antenna that reached several feet behind him.

"What is that thing?" Zangya asked, having regained her eyesight and deciding that asking about the monster was more pertinent than asking about Vegetto's transformation.

"Majin Buu" Vegetto replied while staring Buu down. It seemed that all those absorptions had made Buu insane, as his eyes looked every which way and his hands clenched at random intervals.

"I suggest you head back" Vegetto told Zangya before he rushed forward.

While Buu didn't seem to be in this world, he was definitely powerful. Vegetto's attempted punch flew right through an after image. He gasped out and barely dodged a pink fist from clocking him in the jaw. He brought his legs up to dodge a sweep from the pink menace. With a growl he brought his fists down on the top of Buu's head,, sending him crashing to the ground, creating massive shockwaves.

Buu burst from the ground almost instantly, blasting a large ball of ki out of his mouth. Vegetto dodged easily and flew higher up, waiting for Buu to follow.

They burst through the clouds and broke through Snake Way, coming out into open space. Vegetto shot off a succession of ki blasts which Buu weaved around, trying to get closer to the Saiya-jin.

Zangya flew through the hole made by Buu in Snake way, amazed that she was actually in the afterlife. She looked over to where her lover and the pink blob were currently duking it out, exchanging blows.

Vegetto traded blows with Buu, impressed that the monster was keeping up with his Super Saiyan form. Buu tried an uppercut but Vegetto leaned back and shot a knee at the monsters stomach. Buu growled out in pain but kept soldiering on, receiving more hits than he was giving.

Vegetto kicked the monster on the side of the head, following it up with a knee to the other side and a backhand that sent buu flying off into the distance.

"How the hell do you move so fast?" Zangya yelled out at him frustrated. She could barely keep up with either of them.

Vegetto landed next to her on snake way, deciding to let Buu come to him. "Is it really that shocking?" he asked cockily.

"You're training me the moment you kill that thing" she told him. She knew he was powerful, but this was beyond what she'd imagined.

Vegetto responded with a grin and turned around on the spot, delivering a kick to a jet of pink goop. Buu had turned himself into a sort of missile. Vegetto's kick sent it careening sideways but Buu quickly changed forms and expanded, trying to engulf Both Vegetto and Zangya. Zangya eased up back to back with Vegetto, knowing that she wasn't very useful in this situation.

Vegetto fired up a ball of ki in his hands and waited until the last moment. Just when Buu was going to constrict on them he used instant transmission to teleport himself and Zangya away from the monster, who enveloped the ki-ball, which promptly exploded. Many bits and pieces of Buu flew off into the distance; Vegetto deftly detonated them one by one telekinetically, his eyes moving rapidly from pieces to piece.

Buu's main mass shaped into a humanoid shape again, a now angry deranged monster attacked Vegetto head on with rapid-fire punches. He fired off a mouth blast at Vegetto's head. Instead of dodging Vegetto punched the blast back into Buu's mouth, sending the monster once again careening backwards.

Buu glared at Vegetto as the back of his neck reformed; then the monster got an idea. He _had _absorved more than just strength, after all.

The realization hit Vegetto just as Buu took a deep breath and held it, freezing time instantly. The pink demon chuckled in triumph; he didn't need to breathe so he could hold air in his lungs forever if needed.

He focused on the man in front of him. Many of his consciences had hatred for this being; but the great majority had no opinion of him. Absorbing that many spirits had been a mistake, but once he got past ten he simply couldn't stop.

He thought about what he would do to this monkey. Turn him into candy _(a part of him was sure that hadn't worked before) _turn into good and fly down his throat or simply punch him.

Punch him it is.

Buu flew triumphantly at the saiya-jin, took a mighty swing and came up with nothing but air.

_The bastard had made an after image._

Buu gazed around and found him, attempting to fly off into the distance. He charged again, brought his fist back and swung.

And missed.

He repeated this several more times; coming up to what appeared to be Vegetto and punching nothing but air. This was getting very frustrating. Many of him thought about simply destroying other world, but others were against it so he was undecided.

After coming up with the hundredth after-image, a smart thinker inside his head formulated a plan.

_Kill the bitch he's with. Get time moving again. He'll be so distraught he'll stay in one place long enough for you to kill him. _

Genius! He found the red-head floating a few meters above Vegetto's original after-image.

The evil djinn grinned maniacally as he powered up a kienzan and threw it at the blue skinned alien. The energy disk easily cleaved through her torso. Buu jumped excitedly but contained his laughter; he'd need to be silent so that the first thing Vegetto notices would be the dead body.

Buu let go of the breath he was holding in. The environment returned to its coloring; the fluffy white clouds, the blue sky, the shining purple light.

Buu only had enough time to look down before he was engulfed by a massive Big Bang Attack. The blast incinerated every element of his body down to its essence, and every tenant of hell met complete deletion from existence.

"Uh-oh" Vegetto grimaced.

"Don't tell me that blast didn't get him?" Zangya protested from her seat on his back.

"It did, but I might have put a little too much juice in it" he furrowed his brow before flying off behind the beam of ki. Zangya was blown back from the impulse and he could almost hear her curse him under her breath.

The blast was flying off into the distance at insanely high speeds. Vegetto kept it's trajectory in his line of sight before using instant transmission to teleport a long distance in front of the blast.

Bracing himself and tensing up, he sent a mighty yell at a stretch of open space in front of him. Augmented with ki, the yell broke a hole through the dimensional barrier. Vegetto stepped aside just as the blast went through the hole, which closed up harmlessly.

He landed back on Snake Way, where Zangya was inspecting her body double.

"I can see that you molded the body from part of this… highway" She said while tossing away a piece of rubble. "But where exactly did you find this wig?" she asked at the red wig of curly hair.

"We'll you know, I remembered this place on earth that sold wigs so I teleported over and looked for it. I found the shop after a little searching and got this little number" he stated while wriggling the wig around.

"Do you really have to be so smug about it?" she asked him crossly.

"Yes"

At that moment, Kibito Kai materialized in front of them along with King Kai and the Grand Kai.

"Well Vegetto" Kibito Kai began. "You've saved the universe once again. I was going to say that we owed you one, but seeing as you've just decimated an entire aspect of the afterlife and it'll take centuries of paperwork to get everything back in order, I'd say we're even" kibito Kai nodded solemnly and materialized away with the Grand Kai.

"What crawled up his ass and died?" Zangya questioned. Vegetto was thinking the same thing, what happened to the pushover he knew and had been planning to abuse for even more privileges in the afterlife?

"Don't speak about him like that!" King Kai snapped. Zangya looked down at him with a raised eyebrow, not knowing that this man's death had actually lead to her release.

"He's just bummed because of all the work us Kais will be doing to fix hell back up, now that we don't have onis or occupants." He sighed.

"Well, we'll be seeing you later King Kai" Vegetto said.

"Yeah, yeah sure" replied a defeated Kai as he left for the Grand Kai's planet.

"Hopefully your life is always this exciting" Zangya said as she lazily fixed a strand of her hair.

"Believe me babe, you haven't seen anything yet"

**I took a few liberties with Bojack and crew,making them actual space pirates. This was really a plot bunny that I couldn't let die, though I do have a much more massive idea dealing with these characters and more.**


	2. Chapter 2

d"Are you sure about this?" the minute alien squealed out in a high pitched Voice.

Vegetto gave it a confident grin. "Of course, now pull the trigger"

The little vermin avoided Zangya's smoldering gaze, which promised pain if it managed to screw this up, and pulled the metaphorical trigger which was actually a lever.

Vegetto and Zangya were strapped to a machine that resembled a roller coaster cart, which at the moment was shaking and trembling almost as much as its tiny owner. It wasn't every day that you were approached by a notorious space pirate and her spiky haired companion to use your newest technology. Cruban's heart still couldn't handle the sudden shock and fear it felt. The machine was a prototype; it hadn't even been tested yet! The worst thing was that if it screwed up, and there was a eighty percent chance of that happening, there was only a five percent chance of them dying and a ninety-nine percent chance of Zangya killing him for wasting her time.

He would haunt the asshole that had told them about the machine.

"Oh boy, it's going to work!" Vegetto said excitedly, Zangya rolled her eyes at this.

"I don't even know if that's a good thing" she scoffed.

The cart they were in stopped its shaking as its rickety parts settled down; to any other observer it would seem that the machine had failed, but the two people sitting on it could sense the subtle shifts in power coming from the front of the cart and conglomerating at the back.

Cruban let out a sigh of relief as the cart blasted off and disappeared into nothingness. The time machine had worked.

He'd left the blueprints inside the cart.

Fuck.

"One of you is tough enough to handle. A million monkeys will be hell" Zangya commented as they exited the cart. She remembered to take the blueprints with her and blasted the little contraption away.

It had been a few months since the events in other world. Vegetto had gotten the impression that the kais were mad at him, what with none of them, not even King Kai, responding to his calls. Besides that life was rather boring for him and Zangya, travelling from planet to planet looking for adventure and finding dirt.

That was when he decided to do look backwards for his entertainment needs. The plan was to go back in time to before planet Vegeta came into contact with Frieza. Vegetto would take over the planet and create an empire for himself and Zangya to rule over, he'd maybe even take the dragon balls and wish for immortality to make it more interesting.

They were in a swampy marsh instead of Cruban's house. That was expected, they had gone back in time about seventy years after all. Vegetto had Vegeta's memories, so he knew that at the moment King Vegeta had just been crowned ruler after his father passed away. All he needed now was to find saiya-jin ki signals and teleport them to planet Vegeta.

That was when he knew something had gone wrong; before he even found any saiya-jin kis he felt a massively familiar energy signal off in other world facing a different but also slightly recognizable ki signature.

"Ok, that's pretty weird" Zangya looked at Vegetto in confusion, he'd taught her how to sense ki but she wasn't as good at it as him yet. Still, weird didn't equal bad to Vegetto.

"What's weird?" she asked him.

"Remember that pink guy from other world?" she nodded.

"Don't tell me, alive and kicking right?" she asked him. Vegetto responded with a nod and one hand on her shoulder and the other to his temple. Zangya braced herself as they were teleported to the location of the fight.

It was a mountainous and barren area that reminded Vegetto of the first fight between his selves on Earth. There were explosions off in the distance where he sensed Buu was at. Silenty he and Zangya floated towards the battle without being noticed by anyone.

There was short fat thing watching the fight. From afar it looked almost like Babidi but upon closer inspection it obviously wasn't. Down a few feet below, a much skinnier Buu than Vegetto had ever seen was battering someone who dressed and looked much like the Supreme Kai except there were more than a few differences; the fighters hair was longer, reaching their mid-back, they were slightly shorter than the Supreme Kai if Vegetto's eyes were not deceiving him the person was a she.

She was getting demolished by Buu, trying her hardest to keep up with the pint-sized monster and failing badly as Buu took great pleasure in tearing her apart. Zangya got a crooked smile on her face as she realized the opportunity.

"No better time than now to see whether you're a failure as a sparring partner" she rolled up the sleeves of her jacket and cracked her neck in anticipation. "Take care of the midget" she said before blasting off after Buu.

Vegetto sighed at her quick thinking. Not that this Buu would be much of a challenge, but it was better than what he'd had before. The bright side was that he would be able to gauge Zangya's progress in under a year of training with him, an immense ego boost.

Vegetto flew swiftly over to the little guy, who jumped back from cheering on his monster to looking up at Vegetto in confusion. Vegetto gave him a friendly salute before putting his finger to Bibidi's forehead. Bibidi's eyes were crossed when Vegetto used a little pressure and pushed his finger clean through the little wizard's skull, ending with Vegetto being wrist deep in Bibidi's head.

Meanwhile Zangya had delivered a solid blow to Buu's jaw. The little pink monster's neck twisted around a half dozen times, ending it's rotation to settle straight into Zangya's gaze. He grinned maniacally and her and spun his whole body around to align correctly with his head. When he was all straightened out he pointed his arms forward and extended them in a burst of speed directly at Zangya.

Zangya flew back and the appendages followed her flight path. She zigzagged through the air, leading Buu's hands in a confusing chase that criss-crossed at lightning speeds. Zangya flew straight at Buu with her fists forward, ready to deliver another punch to the demon's chest. Buu laughed as he waited until the last moment to open a hole through his chest for her to pass through.

Zangya had anticipated this and she stopped abruptly behind Buu. She took a hold of his shoulder and pushed him forward head first, causing a collision between the monsters head and his homing fists. Buu rolled himself into a slightly amorphous sphere and retook his body shape, being no worse for wear from the event.

Meanwhile the Western Kaioshin was standing dazed and half-dead watching the fight between the embodiment of all evil and this complete stranger. As a Kai it should have scared her that there was a mortal that powerful without her or her brethren finding out, but right now she was just thankful that the person had perfect timing, she wouldn't have lasted much more.

She coughed blood and her vision swam, she needed immediate help, but she couldn't abandon her savior with this monster, not to mention that Bibidi would kill her if he saw her in this weakened state, if he wasn't already looking to finish her off.

"Here you go" her heart almost jumped out of her chest and her eyes popped out at the sudden words. She put up a frail fighting stance against the person who had spoken, a tall spiky haired man dressed in a fighting gi and with…

"Kai earring!" she exclaimed, noticing the special earrings that only the Supreme Kais wore. For someone she had never even seen to be wearing a pair was almost inconceivable.

"Here, take this, it'll heal you up" he held his palm up higher, showing off a little green bean. She looked down at it and up at his eyes, using her mental powers to find any sign of deceit. She was shocked when she couldn't penetrate his mental defenses.

"You can trust me, here I'll prove it" he cut a small piece off the bean and ate it. Instantly his muscles swelled up, veins popping and swelling before coming back down to a normal level. The Western Kai hesitated for a moment before looking back into his eyes to convince herself of his intentions. She narrowed her eyes and snatched the bean up and ate it in one movement, bracing herself for the worst.

She felt a rush of energy coming from the pit of her stomach and flowing outward throughout her whole being, healing all her cuts and magically removing the caked up blood from her skin and clothes. It did even more than heal her though; it gave her the craziest sugar rush of her life, heightening her energy levels to the stratosphere.

"Wow! What was that?" she lost all decorum of a Kai and became her usual wide-eyed self when faced with something she didn't understand, she was the youngest and most jovial of the Supreme Kais after all.

"Senzu bean, grown on earth" Vegetto said with a wink.

"Earth huh?" she scratched her head in thought "Never heard of it, must be new"

There was a huge explosion in the background that caused them to turn their backs. Zangya was breathing heavily with her arms forward, a small cloud of smoke and debris quickly clearing up to show empty space. She smirked in triumph and removed a strand of hair that had gotten in front of her face.

"Rather simple if you ask me" she only had time to register shock as Vegetto sent a blast her way. The blast went slightly to the left though, hitting a little pink glob that had been sneaking up on her.

"Still need some work on your finishes I think" he quipped as Zangya frowned, angry at herself for having missed that little piece. She floated towards the other two stretching after a hard fought battle.

The Kai dropped her head when Zangya reached them. "Thank you, you have saved not only me but the entire universe"

Vegetto chuckled at this. "Bet you never thought to hear those words aimed at you, eh Zangya?" Zangya glared at him for ruining her moment of glory. She enjoyed adulation any way it was dished out, it was just easier to earn it through pillaging than through honest work.

She ignored Vegetto and addressed the kai. "So you're the supreme kai?" she asked, taking note of her attire.

"Supreme Kai of the western quadrant of the universe" she corrected. This made something click in Vegetto's mind, he remembered a story the Supreme Kai had told him about Majin Buu.

"Oh crap I get it now" he hit himself in the forehead, realization hitting him.

"Get what now?" Zangya asked him drily.

"We went back too far, five thousand years too far" Zangya groaned at this, she knew something would go wrong the moment they'd heard that stupid story about a time machine at the bar.

"So now we're stuck too far back in the past" she rubbed her temple, Vegetto wanted excitement and he'd gotten it.

"What do you mean; we still have the time machine and the blueprints!"

"A time machine that goes backwards, not forwards" she pointed out.

"Oh" Vegetto shrugged. "Guess you're right" he patted the back of his head in a way reminiscent of his dumber half.

"I gather you guys are time travelers then?" the western Kai cut in. The couple looked at each other, silently wondering whether they'd have to kill her soon, before turning to her and nodding.

"What's the future like then?" she asked excitedly. Not even a Kai could see into the future, that in the realm of old hags and witches.

"Doesn't matter now I guess" Vegetto mumbled. This put a damper on his plans, he had no idea in what state the saiya-jin race would be in at the moment but he seriously doubted they had the mental capacity for complicated thought, much less enough to build an empire on. He looked the western kai over; she was rather nice looking in a way, not much in the chest area but very cute.

He transported his thoughts to Zangya, who narrowed her eyes at the thought. They had a quick mental discussion, until Vegetto said something that forced her to hide an evil smile.

The three of them would build an even better empire.

"Who are these strangers Westie?" the northern kaioshin, a short stubby man with a moustache and carrying a fishing tod, was the first person to greet them when the Western Kai teleported them to the sacred realm of the Kai. There had been very few instances where a lower Kai had actually been allowed to enter the realm, much less a mortal.

"They saved me Northie! They killed Buu! Plus they're on a mission from the future!" she blurted out in barely contained excitement.

"THEY WHAT?" he yelled out. This brought the other four kais jogging into the scene, wondering what was up.

"They're on a mission to warn us about some big evil coming in five thousand years!" she repeated.

"No not that, the other part" the Northern Kai said testily, studying the two strangers in front of him.

"They killed Majin Buu and Bibidi"

This elicited gasps of shock from the three directional Kai's and a look of contemplation on the face of the Gran Supreme Kai.

"You say they came to warn us about a threat from the future?" he directed the question generally, not minding who answered, giving Vegetto an opening to speak.

"Yes Mr. Supreme Kai sir, we were supposed to go back a few years to warn the Kai of our time about the threat but our time machine went too far back" he decided to show deference and not look the old Kai in the eyes, staring at the floor with studious firmness he had learned from Vegeta's days in Frieza's army.

The jolly old kai twisted his face in confusion "The kai of that time you say, but the five of us should still be kais five thousand years from now"

"I'm afraid that if we hadn't intervened, only the Eastern Supreme Kai would have survived Buu's wrath" Zangya told him.

This startled all except the Grand Kai who remained ever calm. He simply nodded "Wouldn't have thunk Eastie to be the last man standing, that's what makes the universe what it is" he smiled at the two mortals, fully embracing them in his confidence.

"Tell me then, what is this future threat that the killers of Majin Buu cannot handle?"

Vegetto offered him his most genuine sad smile "The threat the future faces isn't physically powerful, it's a culture. An evil man named Frieza created a universal empire and has ruled for one hundred years with an iron fist. Zangya and I were part of a rebel faction that managed to defeat Frieza after decades of fighting" Vegetto paused here to make sure the kais were listening closely.

"We thought the war was over, but it had only started. It seems that a hundred years is enough to change the way many people think. Instead of being lauded as heroes the entire universe despised and hunted us like dogs" Zangya was working the haunted look in her eyes perfectly, very convincing actress, she was.

"Even dead Frieza was still king, the people of the universe didn't know how to live, they though their existence's only meaning was to serve and worship Frieza. That's when Zangya and I realized that the only way to win this war was to go back before Frieza's reign, before the universe became the dark evil place it ended up becoming"

The Grand Kai was gazing at the duo with a look of pure compassion on his face. The others had varying degrees of indifference at the talk of Frieza. The South Kai was stuck on the fact that these two mortals could have defeated a monster like Buu while the East Kai was petrified at the thought that that bleak future had happened under his watch.

"You two do not need to worry about the future, you're welcome to spend as much time as you want here as our guests of honor" the Grand Kai told them kindly, waving his hand outward as a way to present the beautiful three-mooned landscape to them. Vegetto allowed a meek smile to show on his face, now came the long con.

"Hah!" came a triumphant shout as the Western Kai as she sneaked up on Vegetto and nicked his carp. She didn't wait for his response as she went off running into the distance as fast as she could.

"HEY! That's mine!" Vegetto looked down at his half finished bowl of rice for half a second. He decided to take it with him as he chased after the youngest Kai.

The kai planet was rather small, so it wasn't long before they'd circumvented it more than a couple of times in their game of cat and mouse. Westie was taking as many quick bites off the saiya-jin's fish as she could. Things in the sacred realm had become a lot more fun since his arrival; he was very much like her in his happy-go-lucky attitude

She ran through a long patch of grass that was taller than herself, looking over her shoulder for the saiya-jin but not finding him. She could easily sense him out, but there was no fun in that.

She turned around ready to get a move on but bumped straight into someone's chest. Said someone quickly replaced the fish from her grip as she fell to the ground.

"That's not fair!" she stood up angrily, glaring at Vegetto who already had a mouthful of fish to contend with.

"Wacha mean?" he said between swallowing large chunks of carp.

"You were sensing were I was, there's no other way you could have sneaked up on me like that!" she accused, accentuating each point with a finger poke to his chest.

"Maybe I'm just that much better than you?" he said with a cocky grin. Western Kai gave him a measured glare and Vegetto responded with a more sheepish grin, offering her part of the fish. They sat down with their legs crossed, sharing the large fish, their fingers sometimes grazing.

Meanwhile Zangya was finishing things up in earth. She'd just wished immortality for herself, Vegetto and, after a long time of thinking it over, the Western Kaioshin. They'd debated over that last part, after all a Kai lived for hundreds of millions or even billions of years, but when they discovered that Supreme Kais did not become spirits when they were murdered it was an easy decision.

They'd spent the last few weeks in the sacred realm of the kais, resting most of the time and plotting some of the time. Zangya had been surprised by how willing Vegetto was to not only listen but execute her plans, it seemed that hanging around her too much had gradually brought out his more evil saiya-jin traits.

Zangya had gone and found Babidi just this morning and transmitted him to other world, where the still pre-pubescent wizard had joined up with his father and unleashed Buu on its inhabitants. Zangya had made a show of fighting a much stronger Buu and losing, teleporting herself away and making it look to the four supreme kais like she had been killed in battle. Vegetto had the Western Kai more than distracted in the sacred realm; they would have plenty of time for Buu to kill off the Kais and Zangya to comeback and erase the monster from all existence. Eliminate all threats to their power in one fell swoop; she owed herself a pat in the back after all of this.

"A-a-are you sure we should be doing this? What about Zangya?" the Western Kai asked tentatively, her whole body purring under the weight of the much taller saiya-jin.

Vegetto brushed one of her spiky bangs, so similar to his own, away from her face and leaned down to give her a kiss. "Don't worry, just enjoy it" he assured her before nipping at her neck. The Western Kai moaned in pleasure, her eyes going to the back of her head as Vegetto worked over her.

"Kaiza" she blurted out in one breath. Vegetto stopped his ministrations to look at her in confusion.

"What?"

"Call me Kaiza, please" she looked at him with eyes of immense innocence that inconceivably belonged being that had lived for millions of years.

Vegetto began smelling her hair deeply, committing her scent to memory. "I will".

_Five thousand years later_

Three people were lazing around in a field, enjoying a well earned vacation after so many years conducting universal reform. The two shortest of the trio, females, were resting their heads on either side of a six-foot tall raven haired man, who was currently snoring the day away.

For five thousand years the Supreme Kai had taken a much more active role in the universe, enforcing her power as ruler to unite all the galaxies and planets under her command. While before only a select few planets had even bothered with a Kami, it was now mandatory for every planet with intelligent life to be assigned a Kami. There was a powerful police force, laden with saiya-jin's and other warrior races of the universe. There was a big sharing of technology from the more advanced planets like Earth with their capsule technology.

Fraternization between planets was encouraged, resulting in sharing of things such as culinary knowledge and fighting technique. It also resulted in many races intermixing and creating new hybrid species, like the ever popular human/saiya-jin hybrid in one of the northern galaxies.

There was no bigger proof of this fraternization than the Supreme Kai's eternal life partners, both from different corners of the universe.

Kaiza tapped Zangya on the forehead, forcing the green skinned beauty to open an eye up.

"What?" she asked with slight annoyance.

Kaiza yawned; she'd definitely take a very long nap soon. "You do realize I figured out what you did millennia ago, right?"

"WHAT?" Zangya gasped out, a frantic look growing in her face.

Kaiza just winked at her cheekily "You're not as clever as you think you are" she rested her head back on Vegetto's chest, letting off a sigh. "I wouldn't trade this for the world"

Zangya grumbled, mimicking Kaiza and closing her eyes to get some sleep. "We already have the world"

**This all came to me in one night, didn't know how to end it so decided to do it abruptly. DB has a lot of interesting characters that fanfiction doesn't really explore close enough IMO.**


End file.
